Ineptitude 2000
You're a Starter Pokemon, locked in the framework of a smashed cartridge. Ten minutes of playtime released from its gold, silver, red blue or yellow shards. You're Ocean Finance, a campaign to batter the minds of children with the chance to remortgage their Fisher Price homes.
Reloaded, Revolution, Reborn, Revisited. You're a prototype model for failure and sequels to failure with diminishing returns upon each and every poster you print. You will never be Office 2004, bold blue brilliance to redefine the workplace. You will never be Darude's Sandstorm, versatile to be whatever its timeless grains devour. You'll just be you, inept, applying yourself in all the wrong ways.
You're Geri fucking Halliwell. You should stay in 2004 where you came from.
Daniel Bundy is a 3rd year Creative Writing student at LJMU and an In The Red 15 editor.
